It's party time!
party; alcohol; gate; crashers;
Contents
Let's have a party!
Parties are all about;
- having fun
- socializing with people you know
- meeting new people
- introducing friends from different parts of your life, eg. school friends, sports friends and workmates
- celebrating the milestones in life, eg. birthdays, graduations, passing your driving test
- learning how to plan, organize and run a safe and fun party.
Some things you need to know
- Parents of the person holding the party are responsible by Law for the safety and wellbeing of every underage person - that is under 18 years old - who comes into or onto their property. This could also include gatecrashers or people hanging around outside.
- Parents may supply alcohol to teenagers in their home but it is illegal for teenagers to drink alcohol in any public place.
- It is illegal for teenagers to buy alcohol, even at a private party.
See Resources below if you want more information.
Going to a party
If you are invited to a party you need to think about some things first.
- Inside or outside?
- Alcohol or no alcohol?
- Who's driving you to and from the party?
- Who are you going to the party with? Maybe if your friend is coming with you and your parents, then you could go home with her or his parents after the party.
- How long will the party go for?
- Can you stay overnight? – check with parents about this too, yours and the party holders.
- Will there be food and what do you have to take?
Who is supervising the party? [I know, but your parents or caregivers are going to ask this question so you might as well find out.]
- What time do you have to be home?
- Are your parents ok about you going to this party?
- Are you ok about going to this party? Do you feel comfortable?
- Talk with your parents about what to do if you feel unsafe or uncomfortable with what is happening. I used to say, "Get a 'headache' and call me I'll come and get you" to my kids.
Have you got an emergency plan in case something goes wrong? eg. money for a taxi? Got your phone or phone card?
- Do your parents know where you are going and can they contact you if necessary?
- Check with others about what they are wearing so that you feel like you fit in.
- Keep an eye on your drink and stick to the same one that you can recognize if you are somewhere you don't know or with people you don't know. Have a look at the topic 'Spiking drinks'.
- Learn how to say "No thanks" then move away if you are being offered drugs. It's cool to know your own mind. It's not cool to be out of it and having to listen to all the stories people are telling about you afterwards.
Having a party at your place
Having a party at your place can be a lot of fun but it is also a lot of work.
The good
- The good things are that you learn how to plan and organize.
- Who to invite?
- How many?
- What times, food, drinks, music, games or fun things to do?
- Whereabouts to have the party.
- Is it a dress-up or theme party?
- You learn to work and communicate with parents about numbers, times, rules, ‘no go' areas and who is doing what.
- You learn to communicate with friends by inviting them, telling them what is and isn't acceptable at your place, and maybe asking some of them to help you get things ready.
- You get to learn how to be a host and look after your guests.
- You get to look out for others and make sure that no-one is left out, feeling uncomfortable or unsafe.
- You get to have fun with your friends!
The bad
- Parties cost money so you need to work out how you are going to pay for it!
- They take a lot of discussion and organizing if they are going to work well.
- You have to decide on a number of people to invite and stick to it, and that can be difficult sometimes.
- You have to realize that parents and other adults need to be there. It may be your home, but it's your parents' house and they are the ones responsible.
You also get to learn how to tidy up as you go so that there isn't a huge mess to face the next day!
This is where you also find out who your real friends are. They're the ones who are helping you set up and even more importantly clean up!
Avoiding the ugly
Gatecrashers can totally ruin a party and create all sorts of drama.
- Avoid this by sending written invitations and saying clearly that no-one gets in without one.
Invitations
- Need to state time of party from ‘go to whoa'.
- Need to say whether alcohol is provided or allowed.
- Need to be replied to. This gives you, your parents or theirs the chance to talk about any concerns.
There need to be responsible adults at the party.
- Maybe your mum, dad and a couple of their friends?
- Sports coaches are good too because they know how to relate to kids without saying 'Don't' all the time, and they probably know you and some of your friends already.
Let the neighbours know that you are having a party. You can letterbox a note or call round the week before.
If it is a big party then let the Police know so that they can keep an occasional eye on things. Check out noise regulations so that you know when the loud noise needs to stop!
- Have only one way in and have someone, an adult, on the door to check invitations.
- Clearly label where the toilets and bathrooms are.
- Have 'OUT OF BOUNDS' signs on anywhere you don't want people to go.
- Remove your personal items from your room and lock them away if there are likely to be some people you don't know well at the party.
- Have food! Nibbles are ok, but it is a good idea to have more substantial food about 2 hours into the party. It's fun to prepare, doesn't need to be madly expensive and brings everyone together again.
- Use plastic 'glasses' and cutlery and throwaway plates.
- Make sure you have plenty of garbage bags ready.
- Check friends as they leave and make sure that they will be getting home safely. Crashing on your floor is a better option than crashing in a car or on a bike!
Some tips to help you have a good time at your party
Get everything organized so that a week before you know exactly what to do.
- Have check lists for everyone involved so that they know what they are responsible for.
- Set up the space, the music, lights and whatever else early in the day, then you can concentrate on food, setting up drinks, glasses and cutlery.
- Then relax!
During the party
- Get round and talk to everyone.
- Have a 'team' of helpers so that you are not trying to do everything yourself.
- If there is alcohol don't get blasted or you won't remember your own party!
- Have a friend stay over so that when everyone else has gone you can enjoy talking about it.
Have fun and stay safe!
Resources
South Australia
Australia
The information on this site should not be used as an alternative to professional care. If you have a particular problem, see a doctor, or ring the Youth Healthline on 1300 13 17 19 (local call cost from anywhere in South Australia).